For awhile, I thought it was just me. I figured I was just unlucky enough to attract the most obnoxious, immature, and generally stupid guys in my area (which consists of 7+ colleges). And then, I began to realize it wasn't just me. This was a problem, plaguing all girls on every campus.
Conversation last weekend at a party:
Him: "'Sup girl?"
Me: "Hey. Not much, how 'bout yourself?"
Him: "What size pants do you wear?"
Me: "What?"
Him: "What size pants you wear? C'mon don't be shy."
Me: "Unless you plan on borrowing them, I don't see why you need to know that..."
Him: "Ahh, nahhh gurrrll! I ain't gonna borrow them. I just wanna know what size can fit such a fine ass as yours into them."
Me: "Uh... thanks? I gotta go, bye."
Him: "C'mon girl don't be like that! You don't know how to take a compliment."
At times like this, I can't help but wonder if maybe he's actually retarded. Or maybe I am in fact the retarded one for not picking up on his obvious charm and wit.
Every college freshie boy I've met wants one thing and one thing only: sexy time. Pants-off party- Poppin' boners on the dance floor - Show me your titties - I wanna bend you over this beer pong table and prove that everything really is bigger in Texas!! - sexy time. ....And to that I say: No, gracias.
C'mon! I'm trying to make meaningful, long-lasting, fun friendships over here! I don't want your pent-up sexual frustration! Take it the showers, mister. And while you're at it, take a hint from the juniors and seniors: the way to a girls' la-ti-da is by making her laugh and/or convincing her you're a decent human being.
I guess I'll just have to wait it out. Maybe someone will give them all a good beating with the maturity stick.
I'd say it's a combination of media portrayals of college and general biology.
Look at how college is displayed on TV and movies. Tons of beer, tons of sex, tons of whores, and just plain old ridiculous bullshit that barely anybody experiences. Is college a blast? Absolutely. Do chicks frequently walk up to you carrying pints and asking if you want to see their tits? No and if they do, they have crabs, stay away. Boys have just as much social pressure as girls, especially during college. Guys are supposed to be drunken sex studs and girls are supposed to be willing experimental freaks, they're gender roles that get reinforced constantly. So it's only expected that a lot of guys will go into college high on college stereotypes they learned through the media. As I guy, I know I was curious to see if any of it was true, but I was rightfully skeptical.
Then again, it's also biology. New place, new people, and new experiences are very exciting.
Excitement just gets the blood flowing and blood flow in a young man is regulated mostly by sex drive.
No offense, but you may want to consider your environment. College guys generally don't go to parties looking for long-term relationships. And of course, alcohol is a big factor in how a guy or girl treats a member of the opposite sex. I'm somewhat confused by your post; do you honestly think you'll find quality guys stumbling around the beer pong table?
If you're into guys like you described (and it seems like a lot of women are now-a-days) and you like one-night stands, being valued for your looks only, or not remembering exactly what you did the next morning you're in the right place. If not, you're definitely in the wrong one.
I think going to a college party and complaining about how the guys treat you poorly is like going to a bar and complaining that everyone is drinking.
No offense, but that's complete bullshit. alcohol and party environment don't give all men (or women) "get out of jail free cards" to be total douche bags. I don't walk around parties with a "marry me?" sign pinned to my chest. that was one excerpt from one incident that happened to be at a party. DO YOU HONESTLY THINK only guys with total crap personalities go to parties with beer pong tables? Stereotype alert.
No, I am NOT into the type of guys YOU described. Obviously. That's the whole point. Try reading a post BEFORE respond to it.
They don't treat me poorly, they're just depressingly asinine and stupid. Your analogy is probably the most irrelevant thing you've said. Again, read the post before you reply.
No offense, but it looks like you might be joining their ranks.
Firstly, I did not mean to say that alcohol and a party environment give men or women a free pass to do or say whatever they want. I'm sorry if I gave you that impression. What I meant is that those two things will make the things you described much more likely to happen. You and I both know that. You may not walk around purposely looking like you want to be hit on, but you don't need to. The fact that you're there is enough. Men want sex, and when you add alcohol and a party environment, they're much more obvious about it. Many, many college guys also like to go to parties to look for that specifically and they often assume that the women there are looking for the same thing (which often enough, they are). Am I saying it's right or okay that guys do that to you? No, but I am saying that it will happen and often for those reasons.
As for what I honestly think: No, I don't think that ONLY guys with crap personalities go to college parties, just like I don't think ONLY people who want to get piss-drunk go to bars. But if you do want to get piss-drunk, a bar is a safe bet when you're looking for alcohol. In the same way, a college party is a safe bet if you're a guy with a crap personality and you want to get laid.
For those reasons, I think that you are highly more likely to meet the type of guys you described at a college party than almost anywhere else. Yes, I honestly do think that. As a college guy who knows other college guys, lives with college guys and talks with college guys as one college guy to another, I honestly do think that. You're free to take it or leave it.
As for you being the type of girl I described in my first post; I know you're not. My point in saying that was/is to highlight the difference in what you've said and what situations you've put yourself in. As I said before, I don't understand how you expected any different at a college party. And no, not from every guy there, but from many of them. Out of the 5 specific lines you gave in your original post, 4 of them contained party references; The first one you explicitly said was from a party and the other three included "party", "dance-floor" and "beer-pong table". I think it was reasonable for me to assume from those 5 examples you gave that the majority of the incidents you were talking about were from parties.
If the guys you're referring to said those things to you or even things like that then they were definitely treating you poorly and clearly had no respect for you whatsoever.
Finally, I honestly don't care what you think about me; you don't know me at all. You seem like a friendly girl and I think we'd get along just fine if we met under different circumstances. I understand why you might be angry about the things that I said, but that's okay. If it makes you angry then you need to be made angry. If it upsets you then you need to be upset. I'm telling you these things because I believe that if you listen, it will help you out and I believe that they are the truth. You're free to think I'm asinine and stupid as much as you want, but give me this: I will never ask you to bend over a beer-pong table for me.
This is generalizing
Not all Freshman guys are like this I am a Freshman guy and I have never behaved like the guys in the example you gave
You can't generalize the entire population of millions of freshman guys on the 8 or so guys that you have encountered
CLOSE
